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My Body is the Present, My Past is Underneath Me

by Jane Gerber

I am floating
in a retrospective,
in a tank of my past.
It is saturated to the brim with salt.
I can see the pillars on the porch
of my childhood home,
the large oak tree from our backyard
that spiraled out from the overgrown grass,
the porch light swaying in
a breeze from days that have met it with more grace,
the popsicles sucked clean from the stick.
All of this is right in front of me.
and all of this is made salt
and all of this is dissolving away.
I am floating
the way stars float.
A pinprick in a dark blue sheet.
See how my light fingers out from my body
and grabs for more and more.
Like the night, I am calm.
This darkness does not scare me.
Light grows in every corner of my body.
In the pits of my elbows, in the corners of my eyes,
and in between my toes.
What is right in front of me is impossible to see
So I made myself into a beacon of light.
I am floating in the direction I was meant to go
to a place I cannot see yet.
I hope it is as nice as where I am now.